Well, what a week! Truth be known, in fact what a few weeks it has been. Life has certainly not been normal- if you could call it normal! It has been a few challenging weeks most definitely!

At the beginning of the year, I had changed my 2023 new year’s resolution to the 2024 resolution of “Don’t work so hard that you are too tired to live”. It was a great saying after the previous year we had had. 2023 was so busy, so fast and went by too quickly that both Marc and I were thoroughly exhausted by the end of the year! But then it was January 1^st…a new year, a new world ahead, a new everything and it was doable, it was achievable, and I felt profoundly good about my new resolution. Now it is February 24^th and life has not been smooth nor, predictable this year……already!  We are riding another roller coaster and not getting off!

It is so common to hear the much-used comment…where did the time go?

When we have a lot on our plates, whether it’s work, school, family commitments, or social activities, as we essentially rush from one task to the next, ‘time’ can seem to fly by. There is also the day in and day out engagement in the same activities’ and these too can accelerate the perception of time passing. For me, my busy Christmas /New Year (when I worked apart from the known public holidays) the investment into a weeklong visit with grandchildren which I absolutely loved, happened and then it was well and truly back to work regularity. Beyond the full-time work familiarity, the non-normality of numerous planned (and unplanned weekends) with family in Armidale, Brisbane, and Melbourne, meant that we were literally in a rush all the time. Flying and sprinting from one thing to the next. Sometimes, it seemed as if life ran beside me, and I had trouble staying level…and sometimes it was two stretched legs out in front of me… and I had no idea of when I was going to catch up! And terrifyingly, do you know that it is only just over 8 weeks since we celebrated Christmas, and I had time with my precious grandchildren!

It is quite funny that when we are children, time ambles by, with school days long and boring, endless car journeys, waiting for Christmas Day to arrive, for those birthdays, those holidays those things we are waiting for that seem to last forever because time appears to go by so slow. However, as adults the same concept of time seems to speed up at a frightening rate, with those Christmas and birthdays arriving so much more quickly every year and any plans made, swiftly come, and go…. rushing forward in front of us like a speeding train. And in my own past few weeks, along that fast-moving racetrack, for me, so many unexpected things have happened.

Expect the unexpected they say!

We all know that saying. Such An old cliché. The phrase means that surprising or strange things are likely to happen, and one should be prepared to face them. To never be comfortable with life and to expect that outside the circle of your average comfortable existence something else will occur. Yes, it does occur and sometimes life does hit us in the head with a brick. Irrespective of whether that hit is minor or huge, that unexpected happening can dramatically affect the rest of our day, our week, month and beyond. Well, as I wrote about in my last blog, we already had one brick thrown at us a few weeks ago, which we I am proud to say have somewhat handled, but to have another thrown at you, (nothing life threatening) a few weeks later, was quite difficult to take! And the ability to cope with the unexpected doesn’t come naturally to everyone!

Philosophically speaking the key is to learn how to respond versus react. In simple terms, ‘reacting’ to a situation is an automatic, emotional response. When we react, we are not thinking clearly, rationally, and often is immediate, driven by anger, fear, or other strong emotions and can lead to us saying or doing things that we might regret later and can damage our relationships with others. ‘Responding’, on the other hand, is a conscious, rational response to a situation. To pause and reflect on the situation and our options before acting. It is when we are in control of our emotions and actions and able to think of the best way to handle the situation in a productive and respectful way.

So, what about me? When I was hit with that not expected second curveball thrown, when our best laid plans made in 2023 for 2024 and beyond went awry, did I ‘respond’, or did I ‘react’ to my unexpected new change?? Well to be honest I did both.

I definitely reacted.

I was angry. I was upset. I was hurt. I ranted. I raved. I cried. I ate so much sugar!  I despaired. I tossed and turned over several sleepless nights thinking how am I going to manage it all? How am I going to cope with more changes that would affect so many things, my staff, me both physically and personally and my husband as ‘us’. How is it all going to happen!  I must admit it was extremely hard as I put a smile to the world that everything was ok, and we were fine with not one but now two changes, as all our anticipated plans for this year and beyond had flown out the window and around the bend! I thought despairingly what happened to my 2024 resolution of “Don’t work so hard that you are too tired to live”?  because we are both tired already!

Then I reflected!

A book I am reading called “Everything will be okay” by Australian author Michael Crossland, bought me back to reality. He suffered so much in his forty odd years of life from early age, faced so many adversities and challenges health wise, yet still today is an Australian Ambassador who speaks to thousands and thousands of people worldwide about coping with what life throws at you. (If you have not read it, I certainly recommend it. It will make you cry and laugh at the same time!) It was even more reflective to me because it was at the exact same time I was going through my ‘reacting’ emotions to the things that had happened. I was angry and feeling down and trying to retain the Pollyanna in me but was finding that hard. I guess my Faith stepped in and made me pick up this particular book  at that particular time,  because as I read through the whole book ( an easy read) and ruminated the final two chapters of his book, the comments that stood out to me was his remarks ‘ of embracing those challenges head on; embracing what we have now, and not of what the future is going to look like; of striving to be in the head space we need in order to overcome life’s challenges and importantly being grateful for what we have already in our lives.”.

Well, those chapters certainly hit me even harder than the first or second brick that had been thrown.

I reflected on his words. On what he had gone through. I took his words to heart. No, it was not easy to do. It is not easy to do! I still worry about the future. I still have sleepless nights, but those chapters gave me a unique way of considering my current situation. And when I reflected on what he had to say, on how he had overcome aspects in his life that were far more shattering than mine, I decided to try and do that. Of embracing the now. Not a projected picture of what it may look like! To get myself into the mental headspace where I need to be to examine where we are. Importantly I needed to look at what I have already in my life and what I am grateful for.

Amidst the adversity and challenges in my life right now, I am grateful to have two beautiful adult children and partners with their own children whom I absolutely love, cherish, and adore. I am grateful to have a position of responsibility within a prominent medical practice and to have most of my staff members work with me and make our business team a family.  I am grateful to have a wonderful family, an aunt who always listens, a sister who cares and others who support me when needed. I am grateful to have my best friend who listens to my stories, hears my moans, and groans, who could walk away, but always comes back for more!  Importantly I am so grateful to have an amazing husband who is there all the time, even when I rant and raves, and become ‘testy’ when sleep deprived, but who also understands the stresses associated. Above all, I am grateful to have enough Faith to believe in my statements above.

Do I sound like I am preaching?  No- not at all, because I probably will ‘react’ again especially when down the road, domino effects will happen because of these ‘unexpected happenings.” I know I will become tired, stressed, and unsettled because I am only human and I truly abhor not knowing what the outcome is going to be or whether it will all simply work itself all out, with little input from me. What I do know is that I will continue to revisit my resolution for this year of not being too tired to live.

So, when I ask myself …” What am I going to do” I will read again those final words of Micheal Crossland’s book and will say back to myself ‘Everything will be ok! and believe it! 

And to quote his final words….” Embrace the Challenge, Empower the Mind…and above all Smile!” 

Okay, I can do that!