“To muse, or not to muse,,,ah but that is not the question! “

08 Saturday Jun 2024

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

IMG_2986It is my husband’s birthday.  Another year older. What shall we do? I know. A gifted weekend away in a cabin in the beautiful foothills of Mt Warning. Actually, the gift voucher was for last year’s birthday, given by his medical staff for his 65th birthday but not yet used, so this was the weekend to do so. Just a year later!

A cabin that was originally an old dairy, complete with concrete floors and a small rug to soften the décor and to ward off that cold concrete look. An original cream separating room transformed into our bedroom, an added on extremely large remarkable bathroom with a vast shower and toilet area, complete with stonework and corrugated walls and a small kitchen with a timber top bench for preparing, cooking on, and eating at.

It was an amazingly wonderful place. What more could we want for a birthday weekend?

The soft chirping of birds sang outside our bedroom window, as sunlight filtered through the trees, casting a golden glow on the green scenery before us. As we stepped outside, we were greeted by the crisp mountain air, carrying with it the scent of moisture and luscious earth. Yes, colder temperature-wise than at home, even though we were only 45 minutes further inland, but wrapped up in our winter warmth, our golden retriever lying at our feet, morning coffee in hands we were caressed by the sunlight enfolding us in its seasonal light.

A trip to the local Saturday and Sunday markets where we ambled along the small country streets, past the fruit and vegetable vendors, past the cake stalls…(well actually not quite past them as we bought a few “for later” …), past the friendly smiles of these modest communities before returning once more to the quietness of our insignificant but attractive country cabin and surrounding mountain view lush greenery. Enveloped by the beauty of nature, we indulge in simple pleasures and heartfelt moments, cherishing each laugh and shared glances as we soak in this ambience together.

It is utterly amazing what this quietness can do for your soul. The silence of the air cloaks you like a comforting embrace, a gentle reminder of the tranquility that surrounds you in this mountain sanctuary. There is a serene stillness that permeates the atmosphere, broken only by the occasional rustle of leaves or the distant call of a bird. It is a silence that speaks volumes, inviting introspection and reflection as you immerse yourself in the beauty of nature. Each breath feels like a sacred communion with the world around you. It is a reminder in our busy world of the profound peace that can be found in simply being present in the moment. In this moment. Now.

In this quietude, as we relax into our chairs, our backs to the midday and afternoon sun immersing ourselves in the sun’s rays of warmth and read a book, we find solace and serenity,

The sun gradually disappears behind the mountain and cool mountain air begins to wrap around us like a soft embrace, refreshing and invigorating. With each breath the crispness of the air clears away any lingering worries or stress. And as that air covers us, we return to the cabin, to sink into the lounge chair, a glass of red in one hand and the same book in the other, with only background peaceful resting music playing. But inside or outside, it is a weekend respite from the noise and chaos of the outside world, allowing us to reconnect with the natural rhythms of life.

And truthfully. even more enjoyable, no hikes were suggested, no bicycle rides proposed! For those that know my husband…this was a most amazing very different situation!

As the last of the sun graces the mountain peaks with its golden rays, I find myself filled with an unexpected sense of relief and contentment of not going bicycle riding. Although I truly love this activity, instead of the rush and exertion of cycling, today ( and tomorrow) I have reveled in the unhurried pace of the day, finding joy in quieter pursuits and the simple pleasures of cabin life. With each other.

But I do have to wonder. Knowing our previous birthday celebrations ..what will next year’s birthday will bring? Where has the real Marc gone? I am not sure I want to even think about it!

Happy birthday to my beloved husband, my partner in adventure (and this weekend, my partner in solace) and my greatest love.

A Mind of ‘Its’ Own…

24 Friday May 2024

Posted by in Life's happenings!

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , ,

unnamed (1)There is the famous bush ballad by Banjo Paterson with the significant well known first line “There was movement at the station, for the word had passed around, That the colt from Old Regret had got away,” Well these past three days I can certainly say I had a Colt … and it definitely got away! And the only Old Regret I had was – I was riding it!

Five days away from home, a short break from work, a rail trail time out bike ride which we both love to do was undertaken. Now, you would think that three days of 122 kms on a pushbike was physically possible … I mean after all, we have both completed  many kilometres before on different rail trail tracks – some harder than others but of each track completed, the pushbike ridden certainly assisted the journey! Well not this time!

From the moment I got on this bike at the start of the journey in Beechworth, Victoria it was like riding a bicycle with a distinct mind of its own. Actually, I am quite convinced it definitely had a cognizance of its own and IT did not like me one bit. The moment my hands gripped its handlebars, placed my feet upon its pedals, this bike underneath me, quivered with pent-up energy, and I felt a surge of defiance rising from its frame. It was like, ‘Okay … you want to ride me, well let me show you what I can do’. Mounting this bike, I began to pedal, and it shot forward with a ferocity that took me quite by surprise. Riding this steel machine, it undoubtedly made its displeasure known. As I held the reins of the handlebars, it swerved unpredictably, veering close to curbs, gutters, flying through the autumn leaves, swerving at my fellow rider and at times, skimmed along with alarming speed. At moments I really struggled to maintain control, with knuckles white as I gripped those handlebars, feeling its swelling anger in every jolt and jerk. I am relatively sure it found immense delight in these mischievous antics, relishing my surprised yelps and frustrated sighs! I am certain as it gained speed recklessly pushing ahead when it wanted to, the rotating wheels laughed at my proclamations as I sailed pass Marc waving goodbye!

Then of course there was the opposite. When I wanted it to move forward it refused! No matter how hard I pedalled, it would prop like an unruly horse or only go at a slow, begrudging pace. It simply decided that IT desired to view the scenery around and take its time moving through the autumn leaves. This meant I had to fight it and push through determinedly with my feet on the pedals to inform this metal mechanism, that ‘I’ was in control, not ‘it’! Sometimes it was a battle I won, but many times I lost! I could almost hear its mischievous silent laughter as each turn of the pedal either resulted in a paroxysm of high-speed propulsion flinging its rider, me, forward with my hair flying behind me in the wind or, with some winsome caprice, applying such resistance to that pedal turn as to result in knee-wrenching pedalling just to achieve some slow forward motion as we snaked around the rail trail here in Victoria. If I had wished to undertake resistance training/exercise, the gym would have been a much more predictable workout! All this convinced me that this machine between my legs most convincingly had a mind of its own.

As a rest from our normal routine of work, we both had this intention of riding from Beechworth to Harrietville in the late month of May when the weather is rather cool. Marc, smiling on his cool sophisticated non- ‘E’-bike that responded quietly and lovingly to his masculine charms as they rode together in pleasurable calmness of their pedal journey, working as one. Calm serene, a portrait together. Whereas I was the opposite as I fought this demon bike the whole way! But we made it. No matter the challenges and setbacks of this possessed bike, each pedal forward was a testament to my perseverance and resilience.

Another challenge completed and another story to tell! The outcome was achieved!

I had won the day!

Or had I?

And down by Harrietville Victoria where the pine-clad ridges raise
Their torn and rugged battlements on high,
Where the air is clear as crystal, and the white stars fairly blaze
At midnight in the cold and frosty sky,
And where around the Ovens River the reed -beds sweep and sway
To the breezes, and the rolling plains are wide,
The woman from Brunswick Heads is a household word today,
And the cyclists tell the story of her ride.

“The Old and the New”

21 Tuesday May 2024

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

unnamedThey say that commencing a holiday is a moment filled with anticipation and excitement. As your journey begins, the usual routines and responsibilities are left behind, creating space for relaxation, exploration, and new experiences. Whether it’s a road trip to a nearby destination or a flight to a far-off land, the start of this holiday brings a sense of freedom and possibility. Packing bags, planning itineraries, and setting out on the adventure all contribute to the thrill of breaking away from the everyday grind. Even for just a short trip away!  For us, for five days we are out and away. Not a long time but a time to reconnect, to establish separate ourselves from work, to depart totally from the normal grind, to embark on a three-day bike ride, but importantly to create ‘us’ time. Well, that was our plan anyway!

Marc went to Melbourne for a long weekend prior to this week away to embark on a cardiovascular ultrasound course and I stayed behind at home. I mean, what was I going to do while he was at the course? Our dog and other commitments meant that I would stay home, do the boring things of cleaning house, and ultimately meet up with him on the Monday!

That was the interesting first step. Normally our trips are taken together and even though it was only a simple domestic destination – driving to the airport on my own, sitting in the plane on my own (listening to the rather large gentlemen beside me snore the entire two hours) and then finding my way alone onto a double-decker Skybus through the heart of Melbourne to the train station we were leaving from … well this was quite different. (The funny part of the bus trip was that when I asked someone how many stops there were, and she replied, “One”, just the one stop where I was going! Oops, embarrassment plus!) To be honest, embarking on a solo travel adventure, even just the first part of the journey felt quite strange. I had no one to talk to or share a joke with … rather bizarre, but yes, easily achieved and accomplished successfully. Just a unique way to start our trip!

And of course there was the reconnection with Marc again. I know, me always the romantic. Even three days apart was enough for me to miss him and with our first embrace, that physical distance that had separated us melted away and was replaced by the warmth and comfort of his presence. Conversations flowed effortlessly as we shared stories and laughter of our short-term separation, and we walked our way hand in hand to the hotel for our first night “away”.

There is nothing like a rural train trip. The train, with its vintage carriages and gentle rhythm, really does invite you to relax and let go of the hustle and bustle of urban living. The landscape slowly unfolds through the window, revealing landscapes and fields that stretch as far as the eye can see. The pace of the train mirrors the unhurried lifestyle of the countryside, allowing you to savour each moment, a nostalgic journey that reconnects you with the simpler pleasures of life. And boarding the train at Southern Cross Station to Wangaratta, very early Monday morning, that is what we did! Being rocked gently on this train combined with the winding roads of the added bus trip to Beechworth, stress dissolved we arrived at our destination.

Beechworth is famous for its perfectly preserved 19th century streetscapes, especially its collection of heritage-listed government buildings that make up the Historic Precinct. But it is the most known for its connection to Ned Kelly, the famous Australian Bushranger. It was here in 1870 Ned, aged 16, stood trial on a minor charge and served six months at Beechworth Gaol. Over the years, all four members of the Kelly Gang had spent time in Beechworth Gaol, Ned for a total of two years. Ten years later, Ned appeared in the Beechworth Courthouse on 6 August 1880 on a charge of murder. The politics and the social injustices of the time plus the company he had kept as a young teenager had brought him to his Waterloo, a shootout with police at Glenrowan and finally, his trial for murder. The result, he was committed to stand trial and with an all-Protestant jury, was convicted in Melbourne’s Supreme Court trial and subsequently hung. Beechworth has of course since then been cashing in on Ned Kelly stories but very tastefully done! Not to mention the glorious colours of Autumn that we don’t see at home. A most interesting historic day!

Tomorrow begins the bike ride from Beechworth to Harrietville! Ah but a few wineries along the way! Hmmmm I am sure that will be enjoyable history as well!

“To the Mums in Mother’s Day”

12 Sunday May 2024

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , ,

Tbeautiful-bloom-blooming-658687oday in Australia it is Mother’s Day.

A mother’s love is the purest of all loves. To honour this love, Mother’s Day is celebrated. It is a celebration of mothers, motherhood, and maternal bonds. Mother’s Day around the world is such a wonderful recognition for the mothers who work tirelessly for their children, who sacrifice so much, who are just there in their children’s lives, loving, maybe silent, perhaps somewhat in the shadows, but still always ‘there’ and, in return, are loved and respected for who they are, what they did and what they still do. If you have a mum whom you are close to then it is the time to remember her, to take her out for lunch if physically able, to send flowers or gifts or if you cannot actually see her, to simply ring up and say, “Happy Mother’s Day”, because you recognise it is important to just let her know she is there in your thoughts and that you honour and cherish her amazing position in your life. It is a day to extoll her virtues and an opportunity to reflect on how much your mother has done or did for you.

I posted some of this blog last year but, I wish again to share these thoughts because we have to be extremely thoughtful about our Mother’s Day assumptions since, as the second Sunday in May rolls around, we can fall into the trap of wishing every woman we meet a “Happy Mother’s Day” without a second thought. Our hearts are in the right place, but we may unintentionally be insulting, unfeeling and/or hurtful. While it is a wonderful time to celebrate and share gratitude for and with the women, the mother, or the many mothers in our lives, who have helped us become who we are, not all women that we meet are mothers or still have a mother/child relationship where the adjective ‘Happy’ is the best descriptor. As we share those good memories, feelings, days, and Facebook pictures, we must remember to firstly acknowledge the difficulty of this day; secondly to be compassionate, and most importantly, be understanding about those women and children who find today challenging.

For some, Mother’s Day is a sad day.

Perhaps it is because they remember their mums who have passed on and the universal ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ greeting just rekindles their grief. They remember their mum, cherish the memories and images evoked on this day and’ even though they don’t go around grieving throughout the year, their loss today is more poignant and always will be. When she was alive their mother was, for them, a never-ending song in their hearts of comfort, happiness, and sanctuary. Although they may sometimes forget the words, they will always remember their tune. Therefore, it is extremely important for family and friends to recognise, acknowledge and be there for those who have lost their mothers knowing Mother’s Day may bring up a mixture of both happy and sad emotions.

Mother’s Day can be complicated for anyone, but women who have lost a child, may need extra support. I think of the current ongoing wars in Russia and Israel, where we have shared via media the grieving of the mothers for their unnecessary futile loss of their children. In our society, the focus on contented, happy families with healthy children glorified in media advertising and in shop displays can be alienating or upsetting. We do not know if that customer in our shop or colleague in our workplace or even a casual passer-by that we have just greeted on this day with a happy smile and salutation has lost a child. To a bereaved Mother, Mother’s Day is probably one of the hardest to deal with. Such a mix of emotions aroused against their will. Everywhere they turn there are heartbreaking reminders of their lost child. If we are friends with someone who has lost a child or experienced a miscarriage, it can be difficult to know what to do or say around this holiday to make them feel better. Saying, “Happy Mother’s Day”, is just cruel!

What about those mothers who gave up their children to be raised by someone else? For whatever reason they did this, that hole will always remain there inside them of that child they bore and never saw grow up. On Mother’s Day, the other mother, the adoptive mother, is the mum who gets to hold their child, smile and tickle until laughter erupts, share gifts of breakfast in bed with a homemade card or two and flowers, and exchange love and joy. But what of the birth mother? What of the one who conceived the child, grew the child inside her, then cared enough to bring that child into this world? She is not there or present in their life. To think of the bravery of these Birth Mothers astounds me. Whatever the circumstances of conceiving, simply think of the heart and courage that is required to place their child, their loved child, in the arms of another woman precisely because they believe that giving up their child is the best they can do for their child, is both wrenching and affirming all at once. How do they feel today?

Then there are those who do not, or did not, have a positive relationship with their mother. For them, today can truly be an extremely hard day. We have to acknowledge that not all of us have a good happy relationship with our mums. We are not always aware of the challenges they are facing (unless they actually tell you) because we do not know their past. We do not know what the relationship was/is like with their own mum. That person’s connection with their mum may have always been an emotional tug of war. Sometimes Mother’s Day commercialism is like society rubbing salt into wounds and reminding them that although they may still love our mums and really should get on, they know they don’t. They frankly cannot get on. No matter how hard they have tried, it simply does not work. Even if they are still speaking with their mum but have a difficult relationship, Mother’s Day can be emotional and isolating. Isolating since, when all is said and done, if we cannot turn to our mothers, who can we turn to?

What about those children who do not have a mum at all. Think about those dads who step continuously into the role of mums to bring a unique blend of strength, tenderness, and adaptability to their parenting journey. These dads demonstrate that parenting is not about conforming to specific roles based on gender but about being there for their children in every possible way. Whether due to circumstances or choice, these dads embrace the responsibilities traditionally associated with motherhood with dedication and love, providing emotional support, and creating a nurturing environment where their children can thrive.

The relationship between a mother and child is always complicated and tied up in the pressures we put on ourselves plus the expectations of what our society portrays as the ideal mother-child relationship.  So, what of those mothers who tried their best, maybe in very difficult circumstances, but their children have simply rejected and abandoned them? There is no Mother’s Day card. There is no greeting or sharing. There is only silence. Think, how those mothers feel today?

For me, I am one of those lucky mothers where Mother’s Day is a significant and a happy one. Even more, I am so blessed that I have a wonderful relationship with my two children. I cherish the time I spend with them. Even though my son and daughter both have been married now for many years and have children of their own, our relationships are still there. I revere the laughter, the tears, the downs, the ups, the good, the bad, the special, and the very special.

The bond between myself and my daughter is a tapestry woven with threads of love, understanding, and resilience. It is a unique one that I cannot put fully into words. It has transcended time and evolved through shared experiences, laughter, and tears. From the tender (and not so tender) moments of her childhood, where I nurtured and guided my daughter’s first steps, to the complexities of adolescence and adulthood, where roles shifted but our unspoken connection remains steadfast. I know when asked I am a source of wisdom and a pillar of strength, offering unconditional support and a listening ear during life’s trials. And in turn my daughter, brings joy, inspiration, and a fresh perspective, enriching my life with new adventures, conversations, and cherished memories. The bond between myself and my son is a blend of strength, tenderness, and unwavering support. It started with the tender moments of him in infancy, where I cradled him in my arms, and that grew into a lifelong connection built on trust and understanding. In our time, I communicated when needed valuable lessons about love, empathy, and resilience. I celebrated his successes. I comforted him during challenges, offering guidance and encouragement along the way. He in return, in the ups and downs of his life, has bought me joy, pride, and a sense of purpose to this mother’s life, deepening our bond through both shared happy and sad experiences and mutual respect. Then there are my grandchildren. The children of my own children. What an amazing thought! This bond is a treasure trove of warmth, wisdom, and unconditional love. It is a relationship that spans two generations, filled with laughter, stories, and cherished memories, fostering a deep connection that transcends time and hard to describe as each grandchild bestows to me their gift of individual personalities, each one filling a unique place in my heart.

So, what did I do on this special day?

Importantly, I shared a homemade breakfast with my own ninety-three-year-old mother to mark this occasion. Given age and time, I am not sure how many more of those will happen. But I do not need commercial gifts on this day because to me, there is nothing more special than being greeted by a Happy Mother’s Day video chat with my three grandchildren and son. Or to be sent a poem that reflected beautifully (and emotionally I might add) from my daughter in law about our connection. As time has unfolded our ‘in-law ‘relationship has blossomed into a bond woven with shared experiences, mutual appreciation, and a deepening sense of belonging that continually enriches both our lives. Or to then receive a significant message of “Wove you WOTS and WOTS” from my only daughter who could not imagine her life without me … well what more can I say? What I received today from my family is truly all that I need. Yes, I am one of those lucky ones. I have been truly blessed today.

So, I would like to say to all the different types of mums , past, present and future, in whatever situations, or genders, positions or happenings that life threw at you, I wish you a very HAPPY MOTHERS DAY.

An ‘Airy’ Tale!

05 Sunday May 2024

Posted by in Life's happenings!, My personal Thoughts and Musings, My Stories, My Thoughts and Musings, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

flatulenceSo, I am going to talk about something that is not generally written about on a public platform! Flatulence. You know that certain word that makes all of us either explode in laughter or try extremely hard not to let that giggle escape as you hear that melodic sound break out from somewhere close by.

We all know that passing wind, having flatulence, bottom burps, pop offs, or ‘farting’ (the more common colloquial term used) is something that in polite society is not talked about. It is essentially considered uncouth, rude, and definitely not lady/gentleman-like. It can be viewed as somewhat offensive if you ‘fart in public’. But everyone does it. If you have ever encountered one of those people who swear up and down that they do not pass wind, then they are lying. If you are a human being who breathes, you are a human being who breaks wind. It something that must happen! That gas is essentially the byproduct of the air you swallow mixing with the (generally healthy) bacteria and other organic compounds in your large intestine and it finds its way out of your body via your rear-end.

Flatulence is a natural and common bodily function. In reality, an average person passes wind about fifteen to twenty-one times per day. Yes, you may be shocked at those statistics. (I was!) Just look around where you are right now, at all those people you work with, commute with, ride with, walk with, professionals you engage with, to know they all pass wind through the day! Heard or unheard! Come on, admit it, you know that feeling, when that wind is building in your belly in a most uncomfortable way and you are trying so hard to keep it in, and that small squeak escapes, or that large unexpected bottom burp rips through the sound barrier to enter the world. In other words, everyone farts! Accept it. I do not care who you are … you fart!

But while often a source of embarrassment or humour, flatulence, bottom burps, pop offs, passing wind, farting or whatever you want to call it, serves a vital purpose in the body’s digestive process. It assists to maintain gut health and medically we need to pass wind. Think about those abdominal surgeries or appendicitis operations where the surgeon has subsequently entered the post-operative ward and the first questions they ask each patient are … “Have you passed wind today? … Have you opened your bowels?” And you have to answer! And embarrassingly in a room in front of other people! And they will not let you return home to your own house until you answer in the affirmative to these questions!

Now having addressed the elephant in the room, ‘farting’ is part of life. Flatulence is as routine a bodily activity for all human beings as is breathing or eating. No matter how sneaky you think you may be, you cannot “hold in” a fart. Sure, they can rumble to the surface at inopportune moments, and you can often comport your body in certain ways to prevent the little guy from screeching out, but that gas will eventually escape. If you are lucky, it will do so quietly and over an extended period of time to give you the best chance of not being suspected as the one who dealt it. But if you are not so lucky, holding in a stinker could force it to come tumbling out louder than it would have in the first place. It happens sometimes in the privacy of your own home, and sometimes right in front of strangers by accident. But in polite society, it is rarely talked about, and very few own up. And if culpable, most people dissemble, or deny guilt altogether. But it is what it is. Farts do happen.

In almost all cultures, farting is considered distasteful, even odious. And yet it has remained a source of endless mirth for aeons, especially for males and children. They openly think farts are quite hilarious. But it does not matter how old or young you are, I think we can all agree that flatulence definitely has a mysterious power because it can turn a silent room into a symphony of surprise and giggles and outright laughter! It happens when your partner is snoring away and that bottom burp erupts like a volcano to break the calm stillness of the night! It occurs in a classroom of children where the embarrassed child is seen blushing as every other student is laughing and holding their shirts up over their nose! No matter who or where, farts are always funny. My grandchildren all think so! Be honest, tell me, no matter if you are sleeping beside your partner, or in the office, or the school room, or with family or friends, no matter where you are or what company you are in, when you hear that fart, whether it be a little squeak or a long drawn out melodic odiferous version,  have you ever tried not to laugh? The unsuspecting culprit becomes both embarrassed and amused, trying to blame it on the dog or the creaky chair, or feigning innocence because they were asleep and it “just slipped out”, but everyone knows the truth: laughter is just a fart away!

But what happens when you cannot pass wind? When the normal process of releasing gas from the digestive system is hindered, and it leads to bloating, discomfort, and even pain? When you cannot let go of that cacophony of air that has built up in your belly? When that desire to release that air bubble to free that small effervesce of fetid gas building up inside your intestines does not happen? When the air inside you is clearly trapped and it cannot come out? That is quite a different story and what recently happened to me and provided the impetus to subsequently write this blog!

Worked a normal day, headed home, usual sleep, up the next day, walked into work as any other typical day to settle into the standard regime of my business routine, and a few hours in, then it hit. Unexpected sharp rolling deep pains attacking my lower abdominal area. Pain that left me doubled over in anguish. Agonising pains like childbirth spasms but sadly no pleasure of a baby at the end, only more cramping, intense, unbearable pain. Not continuous but in contractions, short and sharp. I worked through my day coping with the intensity building, but by the time I got home it was quite distressing! This pain in my abdomen ranging from a dull, nagging distress to sharp, intense sensations caused Sleep to evade me and by the next morning I was not well at all! Bloating in my belly, nausea, severe abdominal pain, and I was a mess! A shocking scene indeed!

Medically speaking, pain in this area is caused by gas bubbles in the digestive tract. This gas in the intestine or colon is usually caused by the digestion or fermentation of undigested food by bacteria found in the bowel. Gas also can form when your digestive system does not completely break down certain components in foods, such as gluten, or sugar in dairy products and fruit. The discomfort that occurs can range from mild to severe depending on how many gas bubbles are trapped in the body. In health terms, if you are not passing wind that may mean your bowels are not working as they should be. The bowel could be stunned, badly infected, or it could be obstructed and that could, in turn, be somewhat fatal. Non-medically, all I can say it was quite painful and uncomfortable; especially when you do not know how to deal with it. For me, whatever the cause, obviously, something was not right by the bloating, slight fevers, severe cramping, and nausea I was experiencing, and I could not get rid of that pain. No matter what yoga shapes or other body positions I tried, or the gentle and rough massaging my body in between the cramps, or walking, laying down, the imbibing of warm liquids and countless sips of peppermint tea, nothing eased my pain! This was one time in my life I have to say I really wanted to fart, and I did not care who was around me to hear! But no matter how much I tried to squeeze out a small pop off or push a bottom burp through my belly to relieve the abdominal torture, the gas trapped inside my swollen belly simply refused to budge! It was jammed!

In due course, with the interventions of antibiotics and time, my pain eased. As the expansion and swelling of my bowels reduced, the pain and nausea gradually eased, normalcy returned slowly, and daily functioning of ‘living’ began again. But I must add here, just like that baby crying non-stop with colic and then the release of that wind heard through their nappy bought relief and smiles to that child and parents; when the swelling inside me started to subside, and I could eventually pass wind, do you know, that insignificant, small, noneventful miniscule squeak of air that escaped from my nether regions was the best thing ever! I have never felt so happy to hear and feel that fart. Pressure was freed and the smile on my face showed it! A relief to the system in more ways than one! Believe me!

Yes, accounts of the universality of having flatulence, bottom burps, pop offs, or ‘farting’ humour is beyond dispute: farts are funny. They always have been. And, it appears, they always will be. But the moral to this story,  the next time you hear flatulence, a squeak, a bottom burp or  a fart, whether large enough to fill a room or a small insignificant tweak, escape from an unsuspecting now possibly hugely embarrassed human being; as you tried to hide your laughter from spilling out at this humourous  and perhaps somewhat offensive happening, consider the fact that particular  fart  was an important part of that persons day. It was a release to them.

I can also bet you he or she felt absolutely wonderful about it too!

There are moments…and there are moments!

30 Saturday Mar 2024

Posted by in My personal Thoughts and Musings, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Screenshot

Sometimes, amidst the ups and downs of life, there are moments  that serve as gentle reminders that “everything is ok.” Like a peaceful sunrise after a stormy night, or a heartfelt conversation with a loved one, or even a quiet moment of reflection that brings clarity and calmness. These moments reassure us that despite challenges and uncertainties, there is still beauty and resilience in the world and can be profoundly comforting, grounding us in the present moment. These are those moments that create a gentle reminder to trust in the journey, knowing that everything will eventually fall into place. The unique part is that they come in various forms and when we don’t expect them. It is truly amazing!

Why am I writing this?

Because I need to tell you a story…

Picture before you a scene of a person who has been working too hard, who has been stressing about things that were out of her control, who was sleep deprived but still able to smile. She was away for the Easter break with her husband to attend a work conference, seated on a small international flight, with the aim of listening to music on her iPhone to relax and unwind a little. However, this ‘prime’ position resulted being jostled about by other passengers. Why? Because she had booked the seats close to the toilets for her own convenience, quite forgetting that on an international flight, numerous passengers would be queuing up beside her heading to and away from the amenities to attend to their own business! Many!

As an aside here, do you know that queuing up for a toilet visit can feel like participating in a quirky social ritual where everyone’s urgency suddenly becomes the elephant in the room. You find yourself exchanging knowing glances with fellow queue members, silently commiserating over the shared struggle of ‘holding it in’. The queue becomes a small-scale version of human patience and desperation, with each person trying their best not to break the unspoken code of bathroom etiquette. And just when you think you can’t hold it any longer, someone ahead finally emerges from that small sacred chamber, and there’s a collective sigh of relief mixed with a dash of triumph, as if winning a mini battle in the war of bodily functions. Oh yes, we have all been there! Well, imagine this within the confines of one aeroplane aisle. Passengers sitting there ready to jump up at a gap in the queue. Passengers standing waiting trying not to express their urgency when someone takes too long. Passengers happily leaving their small cubicle relieved!  Sound ok? Tell me, what happens physically to the passenger in that aisle seat adjacent to these conveniences. Not much relaxing completed on that journey!

The destination arrives. Happily, doors open. Passengers all disembark!

Coming from a subtropical environment of 25+ degrees both day and night, the cold wind of this southern island’s climate greeted her viciously as she stepped onto the platform.

Did you know that being greeted by cold winds is like Mother Nature’s way of saying, “Hey there, did you bring your winter coat or were you planning on turning into an icicle today?” It is that instant wake-up call where your cozy daydreams of warmth and sunshine are blown away faster than a paper napkin in a hurricane. Your hair becomes a wild masterpiece of wind-sculpted chaos, and you start doing a spontaneous dance to keep warm, hoping no one mistakes your shivering for a new TikTok trend!

Transport sorted to the hotel!

Two tired people entered the foyer to be greeted by a lovely smile.

Do you know that being greeted by a warm receptionist is like stepping into a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. Their welcoming smile and friendly demeanour instantly melt away any stress or worries you may have carried in. It is not just their words but also the genuine warmth in their eyes that makes you feel valued and appreciated. Even just booking into your hotel room, you find yourself relaxing into the conversation, knowing that you are in good hands and that your needs will be taken care of, with attention and efficiency. The room card given, and they both looked forward with delight and anticipation of stopping and enjoying their room, knowing that this travel section was almost at the end.

But it didn’t happen that way.

The expected room, the one she had stayed in before, the room that was in her head with its separate bedroom, a large verandah, fireplace, and lakeside views was not there. Instead, she was standing in the middle of a small box like bedsitter hotel room. No views, no verandah and certainly no fireside! Yes, she was disappointed! A sudden deflation of her expectations and hopes, leaving a hollow feeling in its wake. It was a mixture of frustration, sadness, and perhaps a tinge of disbelief, especially when it was something she was truly looking forward to and it fell so short of her desires.

A rerun interchange occurred with that same lovely receptionist with a dialogue of possibly changing rooms and “this was not what we had booked”. To discover that the room was one that had indeed been booked – the ‘wrong room’. The wrong ‘click’ on the computer had been pressed. This was no one’s fault – just a mistake, an oversight and sadly could not be rectified because being Easter, the whole hotel with its rooms and lovely apartments were fully booked. That lovely receptionist still expressed her same warmth and concern knowing that this was clearly upsetting but there was nothing that could be done about it. The receptionist smiled sadly as the woman’s tears began to flow.

The couple re-entered the ‘wrong room’. Why was she so upset?  She was caught in a storm of emotions, where turbulent feelings swirled and crashed against the shores of her mind and heart. She was in an inner state of intense distress and turmoil, that simply overwhelmed her already stretched coping mechanisms. She felt this ‘wrong room’ mistake was basically the last straw to ‘strip the icing from the cake’ of the past intense few months. Her excited anticipation of escapism from the stress and pressures had turned to a dull reality. Her tears turned to sobs.

Grieving the situation, they both made their way outside the hotel, it was no one’s fault. It had happened. Even though the tears were falling freely, it was no use jumping up and down about it, and they walked past the warm kind-hearted receptionist who smiled sympathetically, into the whirling night winds of cold and despair.

A dinner quietly shared…. a solemn conversation discussed about the next few days, a wine or two ….and a genuine resolution made that “it was just a room” and she could work on her papers in that small room just the same as any other room. No, it was not what she had planned, what was supposed to be the highlight of the medical conference, what they both had imagined, but the original despair and grief turned to one of acceptance – even though still a little sad…it was deemed ‘ok’! Approval, relaxation, stomach knots unwinding, and genuine laughter once again returned, as they meandered along the beautifully lit path back to the hotel holding her husband’s hand.

Stepping out of the cold icy winds into the foyer, this same receptionist held up her hand to stop the couple entering the hotel any further. Puzzlement on the woman’s face as this lovely lady completed her business phone call and then simply asked her, “Had they unpacked their bags yet?” A negative answer (she had been too busy grieving and walking away from the room to even think about unpacking) and the receptionist (named Lena) informed them that she had found another room. In fact, she had called her own manager and explained the situation and the woman’s apparent distress and wanted to do something. The manager then informed Lena that there was an apartment available. It was missing a few things but could be used if she wished to do so. Lena asked the couple whether they wanted to accept this offer of this apartment albeit  a few things missing, in place of their shoebox hotel room? Of course they said, “Yes”. Lena then accompanied the couple to their current bedsitter room, took the bags and keys and then personally escorted them to the 10th floor (the highest one) of the hotel opening the door to a different world from where they had previously come.

What met her eyes was the apartment that she had envisioned. The separate bedroom, the huge verandah, the fireplace, and the amazing wide lakeside vista! It was not just a one-bedroom room, it was a two-bedroom apartment. She was gobsmacked. She was truly speechless as Lena went through the apartment and showed what was missing and enquired, “Was it okay?” Her answer to Lena was a body hug thanking her profusely and more tears. This time not from unhappiness but from acute astonishment and disbelief. I am sure that Lena herself had tears in her eyes too as she handed the new key cards over and left!  This was truly a reminder to this couple, that in a world of commercialism that human kindness still does prevail and can happen in the most unexpected ways and situations!

Unexpected human kindness has a way of restoring faith in the goodness of people and the world. It is like stumbling upon a hidden treasure, a moment where hearts connect and barriers dissolve. Whether it’s a stranger offering a helping hand in a moment of need, a friend going out of their way to show support, or a small act of kindness from someone unexpected, these gestures do leave a lasting impact. They remind us that amidst the chaos, uncaring world and challenges of life, there are still pockets of compassion and that small simple actions have the power to uplift our spirits and fill our hearts with joy. It is a beautiful reminder of the interconnectedness of humanity and the simple yet profound ways in which we can brighten each other’s lives.

Of course, as you have probably guessed, the person in the story is me.

For me, this Easter, I truly have had my faith in human kindness restored in the most unexpected ways. It was really not just about changing a room. I had already accepted my disappointment and was willing to work within its confines. This was about restoring my faith in something bigger than my own world. It was about knowing that someone else took the time and effort to make us both happy with this small gesture of finding another room available in this busy tourist season. It was not for any financial gain, or personal agenda, but just because she could! It certainly created a huge sense of warmth and appreciation and disbelief that resonated deeply within me. It took away the betrayal, the hurt, the stress, the tension of the past few months with this one random stranger’s act of kindness, a gift from someone whom I did not know. That simple gesture reminded me of the inherent goodness in people. It helped me to believe again that amidst the chaos and negativity, there are still individuals willing to extend a helping hand and share in the human experience with empathy and sincerity.

Tomorrow is Easter Sunday.  Easter is a time of profound blessings, symbolizing renewal, hope, and faith.

I truly have been blessed this Easter with something astonishing and beautiful!

I have had my own faith in people restored again.

Happy Easter!

“A change is as good as a holiday…..”

29 Friday Mar 2024

Posted by in My personal Thoughts and Musings, My Thoughts and Musings

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , ,

IMG_2046Wow- what a week. What a few weeks! In fact, what a few months! The past 12 weeks have sped by unbelievably fast, and it is now Easter!

So, you say we can now have a break? Four days free? I can stop, relax, regroup. No work, no patients, no telephone calls, no demands…..Sounds soooo good. Well, no-not quite. Right now, at time of writing, we are on our way to New Zealand for a medical conference. As they say, no rest for the wicked…. well I do believe that we must be totally wicked creatures because we both have not stopped!

I really have to say that these past few months since my wonderful exciting New year’s resolution, have been a whirlwind. Being caught in this whirlwind of busyness has felt like I have been swept up in a storm of tasks, responsibilities, and obligations. At work we have had so many changes, both expected and unexpected changes that have affected work issues and my own personal concerns, and dealing with the vortex of that busyness alongside the normal momentum of my life has required a delicate balance of resilience and adaptability. Being truthful, sometimes, I have not coped as well as I should. A combination of work responsibilities, personal commitments, societal and financial pressures, creating instead of my normal stress free, happy ‘take as it is ‘personality, to that sense of me being overwhelmed and at times overburdened. Sometimes I have felt the unusual sensation that everything is on top of me, and I am suffocating under the weight. Sometimes it has been that awareness of being stretched too thin, being pulled in diverse multiple directions, struggling to keep up with ongoing normal demands and expectations whilst coping with those deviations in our planned pathway that were simply not supposed to happen this year! In the midst of this turbulence, I have found that it is quite easy to lose sight of priorities and become overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things to do. Even more disheartening was that I did not even find the time to buy something for my own youngest granddaughters’ birthday! That upset me greatly!

No, not every day has been like this, I have definitely had some fundays and enjoyable times and lots of shared laughter with colleagues, family and friends ,but on others, it has been a  juggling act of managing deadlines, changes of staff, of organising, worrying, being stressed, and on occasions that feeling of being out of control while at the same time smiling brightly, trying to find moments of respite.

Yes, I have to admit, these first few months of 2024 have been quite different.

Just in case you are thinking oh, oh, another one of those self-help stressed out freak articles because she is depressed, rest assured; this is not one of those tutelages because no I am not. Yes, it has been hard going physically and emotionally but I do have enough faith to know that it won’t be always like this. I am aware, as hard as it has been, that I can embrace those changes, unexpected challenges, and future uncertainties as integral parts of my normal momentum of life, and I will re-set. I will regain my normal sense of balance and control. I also know I have enough faith in my prayers to know that I have a much higher power to assist me! That is truly important!

In reality, I guess this working trip at Easter time will be a respite in a way. They say that a change is as good as a holiday…and it is! Even though we are both going to be working, where we are going, the venue will be different, the accommodation will be different, the view and outlook from our hotel windows will be different and yes, the temperature will be quite different! A drop from 25 degrees to 10 degrees on arrival today! Yes, everything will be different! A respite all in itself!

So, what will I do as I step off the plane to my ‘Work Break Away from Work’? Probably head straight to the hotel room away from the cold! But as I rush out of the cold air, I will remember to stop and acknowledge that tomorrow is a new step towards a warm fresh start and acceptance.

As Micheal Bubles song says…” a new dawn…a new day……” And it is!

Let it Go and See

25 Sunday Feb 2024

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , ,

let it goThis week I have been receiving so many different messages from various sources about ‘stop worrying’, ‘stop being anxious’, ‘stop thinking about things I cannot control’. This included the inspirational book I have been reading that centred around one man’s tragic journey through sequential life-threatening events but his mother’s message of, “everything will be alright” carried him through. I also have been receiving on Facebook beautiful images and sayings centred around ‘staying calm and going with what you know’. And even this morning, the daily guide verse was based on Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything…..” “ A verse I also remember that was used from the powerful musical ‘Come from Away”. All quite remarkable parallel events.

For those of you that know me, I have my Faith and I am probably being nudged along by an Unseen Influence. But of course, have I been listening. Not at all! Instead over the past many weeks of disquiet and sleepless nights, I have been fussing about ‘the known’ while at the same time worrying about ‘the unknown’. Being fearful about changes out of our control that will occur over the next few months. I have chosen to deliberate on upcoming anxious circumstances and hassles that lie ahead for both Marc and me. Then this morning out of the blue, the talk at the church I attend said exactly that.’ Stop worrying! Let fear go! Step back and let God have a chance.’

Funny! Do you think that was meant to be?

Totally apart from the spiritual side, I guess I am the kind of person that won’t listen to ‘messages’ unless I am hit on the head! (yes- I have actually been there before!)

The ridiculous part of all this was that I did not even want to go to Church this morning. I was tired and quite content to stay in bed to continue enjoying hearing the soft rain falling and observe my husband in his gentle state of sleeping. But as the sun rose, the birds chatted, and our beautiful day of rest abandoned …  off we went.

It actually was quite humorous when I look back now at how this happened, or more concise the way it did. We all laughed afterwards. But on my way home as we chuckled about the ‘coincidence’ of this happening, we reflected that in our marriage relationship I am the ‘risk analysis’ person with both feet on the ground whereas Marc lifts his feet off and takes the risk. Basically, I do the worrying for us both. When questioned further, he commented that he is aware of the things that he cannot control but he chooses to concentrate on ones he can. That is who he is. Pragmatic and Practical. I guess that is part of his medical calling. Me. Well, I am different. Yes, I am practical and sensible, but thoughtful. When I met Marc, I actually warned him I was a thinker!  To be honest, I do get concerned about things but often about matters I cannot control. Sometimes it is hard to take a step backwards, or not a step at all and let go!

So, what does that actually mean?

What does it mean to step back, to surrender my worries and concerns to a higher wisdom? Do I see it as an act of defeat or is it an act of trust?  Is it walking back from the canvas, allowing this higher power, the Master Artist to wield His brush knowing that the outcome may not be what I wish to happen, may in fact be quite tragic, but trust that it is part of a bigger plan beyond my control? Is it a weakness or an acknowledgement that He can paint with colours beyond what I can see?  Is it being aware that His strokes can create valleys of resilience and peaks of grace and respite and when I let God have a chance, perhaps I can become part of this Artists work?

I am one who likes to take control. I cling to my illusion of control. I grasp tightly at the threads, afraid that if I release them, chaos will consume me. I need to be organised, ordered, know what is happening. That is who I am. But somewhere in that illusion, I can hear ‘God’ whispering through various edifices, books, sayings, or imagery, within the rustling pages of my control book, that “I need to trust the unfolding of what is going to happen and release the responsibility of my uncertainty.”

No, it is not easy as all that beautiful imagery above. It is quite a difficult aspect to let go. But I guess I don’t need all the answers right now. I probably don’t need to see what will happen over the next period of time.

I dont know what you believe about the universe or a higher power, or have any faith or religion credence yourself. That is not my quest. What I do know , that for me I undoubtedly need a stronger Faith to know that I am held by Hands that shaped galaxies and believe as I gaze upward, that in His cosmic palms, I can somewhere find my view. To watch as my answers slowly unfold in the spaces where I have dared to release my control!  To accept that as Martin Luther King Jr said “I don’t have to see the whole staircase, I just have to take that first step”.

“Everything will be okay…I hope!”

24 Saturday Feb 2024

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

image

Well, what a week! Truth be known, in fact what a few weeks it has been. Life has certainly not been normal- if you could call it normal! It has been a few challenging weeks most definitely!

At the beginning of the year, I had changed my 2023 new year’s resolution to the 2024 resolution of “Don’t work so hard that you are too tired to live”. It was a great saying after the previous year we had had. 2023 was so busy, so fast and went by too quickly that both Marc and I were thoroughly exhausted by the end of the year! But then it was January 1st…a new year, a new world ahead, a new everything and it was doable, it was achievable, and I felt profoundly good about my new resolution. Now it is February 24th and life has not been smooth nor, predictable this year……already!  We are riding another roller coaster and not getting off!

It is so common to hear the much-used comment…where did the time go?

When we have a lot on our plates, whether it’s work, school, family commitments, or social activities, as we essentially rush from one task to the next, ‘time’ can seem to fly by. There is also the day in and day out engagement in the same activities’ and these too can accelerate the perception of time passing. For me, my busy Christmas /New Year (when I worked apart from the known public holidays) the investment into a weeklong visit with grandchildren which I absolutely loved, happened and then it was well and truly back to work regularity. Beyond the full-time work familiarity, the non-normality of numerous planned (and unplanned weekends) with family in Armidale, Brisbane, and Melbourne, meant that we were literally in a rush all the time. Flying and sprinting from one thing to the next. Sometimes, it seemed as if life ran beside me, and I had trouble staying level…and sometimes it was two stretched legs out in front of me… and I had no idea of when I was going to catch up! And terrifyingly, do you know that it is only just over 8 weeks since we celebrated Christmas, and I had time with my precious grandchildren!

It is quite funny that when we are children, time ambles by, with school days long and boring, endless car journeys, waiting for Christmas Day to arrive, for those birthdays, those holidays those things we are waiting for that seem to last forever because time appears to go by so slow. However, as adults the same concept of time seems to speed up at a frightening rate, with those Christmas and birthdays arriving so much more quickly every year and any plans made, swiftly come, and go…. rushing forward in front of us like a speeding train. And in my own past few weeks, along that fast-moving racetrack, for me, so many unexpected things have happened.

Expect the unexpected they say!

We all know that saying. Such An old cliché. The phrase means that surprising or strange things are likely to happen, and one should be prepared to face them. To never be comfortable with life and to expect that outside the circle of your average comfortable existence something else will occur. Yes, it does occur and sometimes life does hit us in the head with a brick. Irrespective of whether that hit is minor or huge, that unexpected happening can dramatically affect the rest of our day, our week, month and beyond. Well, as I wrote about in my last blog, we already had one brick thrown at us a few weeks ago, which we I am proud to say have somewhat handled, but to have another thrown at you, (nothing life threatening) a few weeks later, was quite difficult to take! And the ability to cope with the unexpected doesn’t come naturally to everyone!

Philosophically speaking the key is to learn how to respond versus react. In simple terms, ‘reacting’ to a situation is an automatic, emotional response. When we react, we are not thinking clearly, rationally, and often is immediate, driven by anger, fear, or other strong emotions and can lead to us saying or doing things that we might regret later and can damage our relationships with others. ‘Responding’, on the other hand, is a conscious, rational response to a situation. To pause and reflect on the situation and our options before acting. It is when we are in control of our emotions and actions and able to think of the best way to handle the situation in a productive and respectful way.

So, what about me? When I was hit with that not expected second curveball thrown, when our best laid plans made in 2023 for 2024 and beyond went awry, did I ‘respond’, or did I ‘react’ to my unexpected new change?? Well to be honest I did both.

I definitely reacted.

I was angry. I was upset. I was hurt. I ranted. I raved. I cried. I ate so much sugar!  I despaired. I tossed and turned over several sleepless nights thinking how am I going to manage it all? How am I going to cope with more changes that would affect so many things, my staff, me both physically and personally and my husband as ‘us’. How is it all going to happen!  I must admit it was extremely hard as I put a smile to the world that everything was ok, and we were fine with not one but now two changes, as all our anticipated plans for this year and beyond had flown out the window and around the bend! I thought despairingly what happened to my 2024 resolution of “Don’t work so hard that you are too tired to live”?  because we are both tired already!

Then I reflected!

A book I am reading called “Everything will be okay” by Australian author Michael Crossland, bought me back to reality. He suffered so much in his forty odd years of life from early age, faced so many adversities and challenges health wise, yet still today is an Australian Ambassador who speaks to thousands and thousands of people worldwide about coping with what life throws at you. (If you have not read it, I certainly recommend it. It will make you cry and laugh at the same time!) It was even more reflective to me because it was at the exact same time I was going through my ‘reacting’ emotions to the things that had happened. I was angry and feeling down and trying to retain the Pollyanna in me but was finding that hard. I guess my Faith stepped in and made me pick up this particular book  at that particular time,  because as I read through the whole book ( an easy read) and ruminated the final two chapters of his book, the comments that stood out to me was his remarks ‘ of embracing those challenges head on; embracing what we have now, and not of what the future is going to look like; of striving to be in the head space we need in order to overcome life’s challenges and importantly being grateful for what we have already in our lives.”.

Well, those chapters certainly hit me even harder than the first or second brick that had been thrown.

I reflected on his words. On what he had gone through. I took his words to heart. No, it was not easy to do. It is not easy to do! I still worry about the future. I still have sleepless nights, but those chapters gave me a unique way of considering my current situation. And when I reflected on what he had to say, on how he had overcome aspects in his life that were far more shattering than mine, I decided to try and do that. Of embracing the now. Not a projected picture of what it may look like! To get myself into the mental headspace where I need to be to examine where we are. Importantly I needed to look at what I have already in my life and what I am grateful for.

Amidst the adversity and challenges in my life right now, I am grateful to have two beautiful adult children and partners with their own children whom I absolutely love, cherish, and adore. I am grateful to have a position of responsibility within a prominent medical practice and to have most of my staff members work with me and make our business team a family.  I am grateful to have a wonderful family, an aunt who always listens, a sister who cares and others who support me when needed. I am grateful to have my best friend who listens to my stories, hears my moans, and groans, who could walk away, but always comes back for more!  Importantly I am so grateful to have an amazing husband who is there all the time, even when I rant and raves, and become ‘testy’ when sleep deprived, but who also understands the stresses associated. Above all, I am grateful to have enough Faith to believe in my statements above.

Do I sound like I am preaching?  No- not at all, because I probably will ‘react’ again especially when down the road, domino effects will happen because of these ‘unexpected happenings.” I know I will become tired, stressed, and unsettled because I am only human and I truly abhor not knowing what the outcome is going to be or whether it will all simply work itself all out, with little input from me. What I do know is that I will continue to revisit my resolution for this year of not being too tired to live.

So, when I ask myself …” What am I going to do” I will read again those final words of Micheal Crossland’s book and will say back to myself ‘Everything will be ok! and believe it! 

And to quote his final words….” Embrace the Challenge, Empower the Mind…and above all Smile!” 

Okay, I can do that!

Life Isn’t Determined By The Cards You Were Dealt But How You Play Your Hand

28 Sunday Jan 2024

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , ,

imageThis recent Australia day weekend, at a family members citizenship ceremony, we heard a most amazing motivational speaker who used the adage that ‘when life deals you an unexpected set of cards, you have to be thankful that first of all, you are still in the game, and it all depends on how you play those cards.’  Yes, I do agree. Life is a set of cards. Some cards may be favourable, bringing joy, success, and love, while others may present challenges, hardships, and obstacles to overcome. There are aces, kings, queens, normal playing cards and of course the jokers and much like in a card game, whatever hand we are dealt with, it is up to us how we play our cards throughout our game of life.

But this week we were thrown a joker. A black Joker card that threw us and punched up both in the stomach! 

For confidentiality reasons it is not something that I can go into, but it was something that neither of us expected to happen! Of course, as that deck of cards, as we knew it, started to wobble, I reacted. I was so emotional, I got angry. I felt betrayed. I felt hurt. Yes, I cried, then although I calmed down, I still felt angry!  It was such an unpleasant multitude of feelings released at the one time, by being dealt that particular card. (Just in case you ask…No- I am not sick)!

You know, it is amazing how something as serious and precious as life is compared to ‘playing cards!’ There are so many ways that we use this colloquial phrase. Some days we can feel as though “the cards have been stacked against me” when nothing we try works out or something seems to be blocking our efforts or from achieving goals. I have also heard people say, “I need to play my cards right ” when they want to make the most of certain opportunities present in their life. Sometimes, on a negative note,  when we are apportioned that stack or that one unfortunate Joker, it is very easy for our friends or workmates to be philosophical and theoretical to us as they share platitudes like ‘the concept of life as a set of cards emphasising the importance of adaptability and you have to adapt’, or ‘Life is often likened to a deck of cards, each card representing a unique experience, opportunity, or challenge’. Yes, all these clichés swamp us in their well-meaning proverbs.

We know that these adages do assist, but at the actual time of being dealt that card, they don’t actually represent how we essentially feel. What we see, instead is that in front of us is our once well-balanced deck of cards that have come tumbling down to fall splat on the ground! We look at those toppled cards and think…what am I going to do? I certainly did. My cards in front of me were scattered, and I was not sure which one to pick up! I was not sure I even wanted to!

But yes, platitudes and all, I must admit, there is so much to learn from a game of cards.

We cannot control those cards that have been dealt, but we do have the action in how we respond to them. It is in the decisions we make, the strategies we employ, and the resilience we show as we navigate those highs and lows of that hand we have been given. Sometimes we have to work with what is in front of us and trek through that particular hand dealt, hoping the next hand dealt is better! Yes, there are many circumstances that we cannot change but likewise there are many events where we can play an active role and try to influence the ongoing result. No, we cannot change the cards that have been dealt but, in our playing, with the right attitude we can even win or maybe change the game. William Shakespeare wisely said: “Laughing faces do not mean that there is absence of sorrow! But it means that they have the ability to deal with it.” Sometimes the happiest people are not those who have the best of everything. They are those who have made the most of what comes their way. I guess, it is about what card is goign to be played next!

We all have our ‘hands’ to play. What is in yours at the moment? What are your high cards, and your low cards? What do you have for structure . What runs, straights, flushes,or pairs? Do you know what you are going to do with that hand? What is your next play?

But this blog is essentially about our deck of cards.

So in light of all my emotions, how am I going to play my cards this week?  I do not really know. I am not really sure!

What I do know is that I have the support of people who reinforced to me last week, that aspect of being my extended ‘family’. But I also know it is going to difficult as I truly do not know what will happen. Nor know how it will affect those concerned  or what is seriously going to change!

What I do know is I must try and embrace with grace and courage the willingness to play this particular hand I have been dealt. To continue to smile.  As much as I want to complain and whinge, complaining will not change anything and definitely will not solve the conundrum! After all, we all know there is no use complaining or moaning! Who listens?

Theoretically speaking, what I do know is that every card I play from now on, whether it is favourable or challenging, will simply contribute to the mosaic of my unique journey.  Like Pollyanna, I will play the ‘glad game’ and look on the bright side of life to do the best I can with this situation! (There is a song that goes like that!) Importantly, I can continue to pray this beautiful prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

I will simply see what happens when I play the next card..whatever that is!

To finish my blog, I would like to end with a little story about a man called Elias. 

“Imagine,” Elias began, holding a deck of cards in his weathered hands, talking to the children in front of him, “that each card represents a day of your life. Some days, you’re dealt a king or queen – days filled with joy, success, and love. Other days, you might get a two or a three – days with challenges, hardships, and moments of doubt.”

The children listened with wide-eyed wonder as Elias continued, “Now, the trick, my dear ones, is not in the cards you’re dealt but in how you play them. Life is about the choices you make with the hand you have. Sometimes, you’ll have a winning hand, and other times, a less favourable one. But it’s in the decisions you make, the paths you choose, that the real magic of life happens.”

A young girl named Lily asked, “But what if we get a really bad card, like a joker? “Elias chuckled, his eyes twinkling with a lifetime of experiences. “Ah, the joker – a wildcard in the deck. But my dear, even the joker has its purpose. It reminds us to find humour in the darkest of days, to laugh in the face of adversity, and to not take life too seriously. It is the card to be played in the hand of every person that lies the power to shape your  own unique deck of life.”